So my main break with Wesley here will be the same one I had with him in "On the Education of Children," namely that I don't think the process of breaking the will of a child to enforce the will of the parent is desirable by itself or as a method for the discipleship of young people. I think this flows out of a difference of how we conceive the character of God. When I see the way Christ's Holy Spirit beckons to all mankind, I do not see a God that will use the rod to punish His children; I see a God that may allow natural consequences to occur, rather than prevent them in His mercy. An example from this afternoon, I didn't punish my daughter for running through the fountains in the park, even though I asked her not to and reminded her that we didn't have a change of clothes. Having to sit around in damp clothes while we did the rest of our day was punishment enough, if her whining was any indication! God's church needs disciples deeply committed to His kingdom and eager to work together with each other towards this goal. The church needs intelligent and agile thinkers, people who either know how or know how to find out. The church needs self starters and problem solvers, people who can think in circles around the barriers the Enemy seeks to raise against it. It needs generations of people with mutual respect for each other's strengths and perspectives. I just don't know how you get there with an authoritarian leadership style, particularly one that demands obedience from children well in to their adulthood. When children are taught that the parent has the answers, the parent is the decider, the parent is the one who knows and the one who acts, then that creates a passive relationship with authority. How would this young person begin to imagine themselves a leader, to prepare to become one in earnest instead of by accident when circumstances are thrust upon them? Children need room to try and fail. I might be convinced that this is a modern innovation if I wasn"t already familiar that this represents probably the earliest parenting style known to humanity. Yes, obey your mother and father, but because they know better, not because we serve a God who's favorite response is "because I said so." I don't think our God is that kind of person. I think He's a "come and see why" parent. "Let's sit down and talk about it" parent, a "what do you think?" parent.